Micro Noises 165: 86 revisited
86 reasons Hawthorn cannot be one of the 'Big Four'
In a hangover from the old VFL days, Carlton, Collingwood, Essendon and Richmond are still referred to as the 'Big Four' of the AFL. But is that really fair and accurate these days? Not only do the four Adelaide and Perth AFL clubs, and even Sydney, have more members than Carlton now, but Hawthorn - another of the old VFL sides - had more members than any of the traditional big four.
So the Big Four from a Victorian perspective should now be Hawthorn, Collingwood, Richmond and Essendon, surely. Surely?
Well yes, based purely on membership numbers, but it's a definite 'no' when you view it from a far more arcane and obscure (and therefore, in our eyes, far more important!) perspective. And that perspective relates to losses by particular margins, and specifically one margin.
In last week's Micro Noises we shed light on the fact that the Hawks are the 'masters' of losing by 86 points, having lost by that margin far more times than any other side. This week we noticed that Carlton's loss to Port Adelaide was its first ever by a margin of exactly 90 points. That prompted us to do an analysis of losing margins on a club by club basis.
Our analysis revealed that there are now only seven margins under 100 points by which the Blues have never lost: 63, 84, 86, 88, 93, 95 and 96 points. We did the same number crunching for all other sides and when we were done, there was one number that stood out, in relation to the so-called Big Four. None of them has ever lost a match by 86 points.
So Hawks' fans, now you know why you simply can never be considered to be one of those Big Four. You can lay the blame on any one of the 10 86-point losses your team has suffered.
But what about teams from other states?
It's a fair question. After all, this is a national competition now, and has been for decades. Surely West Coast and Adelaide qualify as 'Big', if not Port Adelaide and Fremantle? Well you might think so, but it must all come back to our strict qualification criterion, never having lost by 86 points. There's good news on that front for Adelaide - the Crows have never lost by that margin - but unfortunately for the Eagles, the Power and the Dockers, they have each suffered defeats by 86 points, barring them from membership in this exclusive club of clubs.
On the other hand, Brisbane and Gold Coast have not yet lost by 86 points, and University never lost by that margin in its brief time in the VFL, so maybe the Big Four should be expanded to include the Crows, the Lions, the Suns and the Professors to become the Big Eight.
The full set
Getting back to the original purpose of our analysis (we'd almost forgotten what that was), only one V/AFL club has so far collected the 'full set' of losses by every margin under 100 points, and that honour belongs to St Kilda. The lowest margin by which the Saints have never lost is 108 points. Sydney isn't far away from joining the club - the Swans are only a 95-point hiding away from joining their former lakeside neighbours. Below is the full list of clubs and all the margins by which they have never lost.
THE MISSING LOSERS
TEAM | LOSSES / MM* | MISSING LOSING MARGINS |
Adelaide | 280 / 23 | 34, 55, 58, 59, 62, 64, 66, 70, 73, 78, 81, 83, 85, 86, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 98, 99 |
Brisbane | 391 / 10 | 70, 76, 80, 85, 86, 88, 90, 92, 96, 97 |
Carlton | 1,002 / 7 | 63, 84, 86, 88, 93, 95, 96 |
Collingwood | 959 / 9 | 71, 76, 84, 86, 87, 92, 97, 98, 99 |
Essendon | 1,028 / 5 | 70, 86, 89, 92, 93 |
Fitzroy | 1,034 / 3 | 82, 93, 95 |
Footscray/WB | 1,022 / 4 | 85, 91, 95, 96 |
Fremantle | 276 / 13 | 12, 47, 67, 70, 76, 78, 79, 81, 91, 94, 95, 97, 99 |
Geelong | 1,070 / 8 | 81, 85, 87, 88, 93, 95, 98, 99 |
Gold Coast | 100 / 39 | 1, 4, 5, 10, 12, 16, 21, 24, 25, 29, 31, 36, 40, 44, 47, 49, 51, 55, 56, 58, 60, 68, 74, 76, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 93, 94, 96, 98 |
GWS | 76 / 53 | 3, 5, 11, 13, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 23, 24, 29, 31, 33, 34, 36, 37, 38, 43, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 57, 58, 61, 62. 64, 69, 70, 71, 73, 74, 77, 79, 80, 82, 84, 85, 88, 90, 91, 93, 96, 97, 98, 99 |
Hawthorn | 977 / 4 | 90, 93, 95, 98 |
Melbourne | 1,276 / 4 | 81, 91, 97, 99 |
North Melb | 1,052 / 2 | 98, 99 |
Port Adelaide | 225 / 20 | 14, 43, 51, 61, 63, 71, 73, 78, 80, 81, 82, 84, 87, 88, 89, 90, 96, 97, 98, 99 |
Richmond | 1,077 / 6 | 86, 87, 90, 97, 98, 99 |
St Kilda | 1,401 / 0 | [108 is the lowest margin by which St Kilda has not lost] |
S Melb/Sydney | 1,233 / 1 | 95 |
University | 97 / 44 | 3, 7, 14, 18, 22, 24, 29, 30, 33, 35, 45, 46, 48, 51, 53, 56, 58, 59, 64, 67, 69, 71, 73, 75, 76, 77, 78, 81, 82, 83, 85, 86, 87, 88, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99 |
West Coast | 308 / 17 | 31, 40, 67, 68, 69, 72, 73, 78, 79, 82, 85, 90, 92, 93, 94, 96, 98 |
* The figures in this column represent the total number of losses each team has had, and the total 'missing margins', the number of different margins by which they have not lost.
History repeats - twice!
It's pretty unusual for two teams to produce a scoreline identical to one from a previous match between the same two sides, right down to the number of goals and behinds scored. It's even rarer to see it happen two years running but that's what happened last Saturday night when GWS defeated Sydney 15.15.105 to 9.9.63 at the Sydney Showground, just as it had done in round 12 last season. Incredibly, the very next day, Geelong defeated St Kilda with a scoreline of 19.12.126 to 13.10.88, which was exactly the same as the one when the two sides met at Waverley in 1986.
A missed hat-trick
One thing we noticed when looking back at last year's GWS-Sydney match at the Sydney Showground last year was that two other sides - Geelong and Adelaide - kicked 15.15 in round 12, 2016. Three teams kicking the same score in a single round is another fairly unusual occurrence, but what made last year's instance particularly interesting was the fact that 15.15.105 was not registered as a final score in any other match in the entire season.
Milestones of the week
Round five was a big one for milestones, with Sydney bringing up the 200th V/AFL appearance of the score 9.9.63 on Saturday and West Coast bringing up the 200th instance of 11.9.75 the next day. Two days later Collingwood scored 11.16 in its loss to Essendon, bringing up the 400th score of 82 in league history. The Swans, Eagles and Magpies might all have lost but at least they gave us some milestones in the process!
Postcode of the week
For North Melbourne, the gulf between its start to the 2017 season and the way it began 2016 could not be wider. The Kangaroos won their first nine matches last year. This season, they have lost their first five, Saturday night's loss coming against Fremantle, which coincidentally won its first nine matches in 2015 and lost its first 10 in 2016. The Roos decided to recognise the gulf between their two consecutive seasons by being 2.3 at quarter time, and 6.5 at half time. 2365 is, of course, the postcode of The Gulf.
And just to reinforce the fact that North's season has pretty much gone down the gurgler, 2365 is also the postcode of The Basin.
Ridiculous footy anagrams of the week
We couldn't let this week's column pass without acknowledging one of our favourite footballers and human beings of all, the Western Bulldogs' Bob Murphy, on the occasion of his 300th AFL match against Brisbane last Saturday. There's no doubt that Bob is a hero to many and that on and off the field he is a gentleman, so it's very appropriate that BOB: THREE HUNDRED GAMES is an anagram of HE'S A HERO, DUBBED 'MR. GENT'.
Meanwhile JOEL SELWOOD has now played in an incredible 180 wins for Geelong, a milestone of sorts, given that his anagram JOE SELLWOOD played a total of 180 games for Geelong, .
Micro Noises is Andrew Gigacz's regular, quirky look at all things footy. The name Micro Noises is an anagram of Enrico Misso, who played one game for St Kilda in 1985. He remains the only Enrico and the only Misso to have played footy at the highest level.
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