Micro Noises 43 - Boxing Day special
A Test for footballers
With the Boxing Day Test fast approaching, Micro Noises decided to put together a team of footballers, each of whom has a first initial and a surname that matches those of an equivalent Australian Test player. With over 12,000 players to have represented VFL/AFL clubs, we anticipated this to be a relatively straightforward task. To our surprise, it was far tougher than we expected.
Despite the number of players to have played at the highest level of footy, quite a few household Test cricket surnames have never been seen on a VFL/AFL football field, including the most famous of all, Bradman. With Bradman not being a particularly common surname, perhaps that wasn't so surprising. But famous Test cricketers whose surnames have never been seen include Boon, Border, Chappell, Hussey, Langer, Lawry, Lillee, Lindwall, Ponting and Redpath (although with Jack Redpath on the Bulldogs list, this could soon change).
Nevertheless, Micro Noises managed to get there in the end and here is our VFL/AFL "Test" team (without including any actual Test cricketers). (Click on the players name to view their profile.)
And the above team's real Test equivalents are:
Name | Tests | Years |
---|---|---|
Warwick Armstrong | 50 | 1902-1921 |
Michael Clarke | 100 | 2004-2013 |
Adam Gilchrist | 96 | 1999-2008 |
Clem Hill | 49 | 1896-1912 |
Kim Hughes | 70 | 1977-1984 |
Dean Jones | 52 | 1984-1992 |
Mitchell Johnson | 54 | 2007-2013 |
Brett Lee | 76 | 1999-2008 |
Geoff Marsh | 50 | 1985-1992 |
Craig McDermott | 71 | 1984-1996 |
Colin McDonald | 47 | 1952-1961 |
Glenn McGrath | 124 | 1993-2007 |
Graham McKenzie | 60 | 1961-1971 |
Keith Miller | 55 | 1946-1956 |
R. (Bob) Simpson | 62 | 1957-1978 |
Mark Slater | 74 | 1993-2001 |
Keith Stackpole | 43 | 1963-1974 |
Mark Taylor | 104 | 1989-1999 |
Jeff Thomson | 51 | 1972-1985 |
Shane Watson | 49 | 2005-2013 |
Graeme Wood | 59 | 1978-1988 |
Two of the Test players above, Warwick Armstrong and Keith Miller, were also in fact "real" VFL players, Warwick "The Big Ship" Armstrong played 16 games for South Melbourne, while Keith Miller impressed in many of his 50 games for St Kilda.
A return to Western and Punt Ovals
Exciting news for the nostalgic amongst us with last week's release of the 2014 VFL fixture. With Richmond and the Western Bulldogs to field sides under their own name (Footscray, in the case of the Bulldogs), matches will be played at Whitten Oval (previously Western Oval) for the first time since 1997 and at Punt Road Oval since 1964.
The VFL season will be bookended by first and last round matches between the Tigers and the Bulldogs. Their round one encounter will be at the Whitten Oval, the first time the two sides have met on the ground since round one, 1994, a match that saw Matthew Richardson kick eight goals and the Dogs scrape home by two points. The final round encounter at Punt Rd Oval will see the teams do battle there for the first time since round 12, 1964, when the Tigers won by 22 points, with Tigers Paddy Guinane and John Northey, and Bulldogs George Bisset and Ted Whitten each kicking three goals.
New weekly
We at Micro Noises are not averse to trawling through round after round, season after season of footy stats. And as we were doing that just recently, we noticed that in the first season the VFL, 1897, each home and away round saw at least one player making a VFL debut. We then checked through the 1898 season and found the same to be the case in each round that year. This made us wonder when the first round of home and away VFL matches to be played, that did not to include a debutant, actually was. To our surprise we had to go through 10 years of records to find it. It was not until round 13, 1907 that a full home and away round of matches was played in which not one VFL player made a debut.
Ridiculous footy anagram of the week
It was announced last Friday that St Kilda's New Zealand international scholarship holder Joe Baker-Thomas will relocate to Melbourne from his home town of Porirua City in Wellington in early 2014. As a 17-youngster embarking on what is likely the biggest adventure of his life, he may not have flown too many times. So it seems appropriate that JOE BAKER-THOMAS is an anagram of EMBARKS - "OOH! A JET!"
Micro Noises is Andrew Gigacz's regular, quirky look at all things footy. The name Micro Noises is an anagram of Enrico Misso, who played one game for St Kilda in 1985. He remains the only Enrico and the only Misso to have played footy at the highest level.
Comments
Terry Logozzo 22 December 2013
You omitted Laurie Nash who played a few Test Matches for Australia in the 1930's. He started playing with Fitzroy District CC First XI at 16, and later moved to Tasmania, where he played cricket for Tasmania against Victoria at 19
He played football for Tasmania at 19 in the Adelaide interstate football carnival where he was called "outstanding", played 99 games for South Melb., then was sensationally recruited to captain coach Camberwell in the VFA in 1940 on "big money". He kicked 410 goals with Camberwell in 4 seasons, and went back to South Melbourne in 1945 ( at 35 !) and played well that year, including the VFL grand final.
As a footballer, many of his contemporaries stated he was the best footballer of all time. Only 5 ft 9 in, he had a prodigious leap and a very safe pair of hands, regularly outmarking taller opponents. He was best on ground in South Melbourne's premiership win in 1933, playing at centre halfback. He was"chaired" off the ground, this honour usually only reserved for the Captain in this era, having taken 13 high marks-Richmond put Jack Dyer on him, to no avail. He could allegedly kick 70 + metres with either left or right foot, in a non professional era when few were proficient with their non preferred. He several times kicked a long torpedo goal on his non preferred left foot, once following a "dare" from his opponent (and friend) Tommy Lahiff ! Gordon Coventry said Nash would have kicked more goals than him(1299), if Nash had been allowed to play at full forward-South preferred to play one Bob Pratt there! Occasionally, he went to centre half forward, and kicked 236 goals in the VFL-he was equally as dominant there as he was at CHB. He kicked 18 goals against South Australia, still a record for an interstate game
He was a frighteningly fast bowler-some say only Larwood might have been a bit faster in the 30's, and Nash was also a very competent batsman. Nash had broken cricket stumps, such was the ferocity of his bowling. Australia's Captain, Bill Woodfull, didnt want Australian bowlers to retaliate with legside theory in the Bodyline Tests, apparently believing it was unsporting and unseemly for the gentleman's game of cricket. Jack Fingleton said Australia's fastest bowler was Nash , and that Nash would have had no scruples "to open fire at the batsmen with elevation high"
Some historians say some members of the cricket Board of Control opposed select ing Nash for Australia-and, allegedly, only agreed to do so after some selectors threatened to resign if he wasnt selected on England's return to Australia in 1937. Some thought he was the only bowler with Larwood's speed, and they wanted him in for "insurance" against any resumption of Bodyline tactics. It may be, in those sectarian times, when some cricket officials and players were freemasons, that Nash's Catholic, working class background, and fondness for a drink and a bet were major negatives. Also, Nash was never one to lack confidence or humility, felt he didnt have to" commit" to either sport, and had the temerity to hurt the revered Australian Captain Bill Woodfull in a fast bowling bouncer blitz. Perhaps the teetotaller Woodfull,soon to be headmaster of Melb. High School, and his supporters had a strong dislike of Nash.
Laurie Nash is one of Australia's greatest allround sportsmen, but sadly is little remembered or celebrated today His name is not included in the Australian Sporting Hall Of fame
Andrew Gigacz 23 December 2013
Thanks, Terry. Great story about Laurie Nash and his omission from the Australian Sporting Hall Of fame is worthy of an article in itself.
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