Micro Noises 45 - Adverse anniversaries
Decades of doldrums
2014 marks the anniversary of the end of some footballing eras, and the beginning of some unwelcome droughts. Here are a few:
100 years - It's a century this year since University played its last season in the VFL. With the League having decided to allow clubs to pay players a few years earlier, the continuing amateur status of those representing University's football team saw the Students lose their last 51 matches, and the club voluntarily withdrew from the VFL at the end of the 1914 season.
90 years - 1924 was the last year a VFL premiership was decided without a "Grand Final" being played. The VFL in their wisdom elected to go with a round-robin finals system, and the flag was awarded to the highest placed team after the top four sides had played each other once. The system proved as unpopular as it had done in 1897, the only other year it was used, and the league reverted to the 'Argus system' in 1925. It's interesting to note that in the two seasons the round-robin finals format was used, Essendon won the premiership. So Carlton fans out there, if you're looking to get one up on your Bombers-supporting mates, you can truthfully say, "Well, your team might have won 16 premierships but only my team has won 16 Grand Finals".
70 years - Fitzroy won its eighth and last flag in 1944. The pain was eased in 2001-02-03 for Lions' fans who chose to embrace the merger with Brisbane, but for many, this is a drought that will sadly never be broken.
60 years - The other team that starts with F and ends with Y, Footscray, won its first, and so far latest, premiership in 1954. Indeed since the Dogs' 51-point thrashing of Melbourne that day, they have made it to the last Saturday in September only one other time, in 1961 when they succumbed to Hawthorn.
50 years - Hard to believe that Melbourne, the fourth-most successful team in VFL/AFL history, in terms of premierships won, has played 50 seasons since without saluting again. The installation of Paul Roos as coach in 2014 has fans hoping that a 13th flag is not too many years away.
40 years - Yes, it's now four decades since Tom Hafey coached Richmond to a premiership for a fourth time. Despite having done so in a span of just eight seasons, the Tigers dumped Hafey just two years later, at the end of 1976. "T-Shirt Tommy" went close to flags again with Collingwood, and to a lesser extent Sydney, but never again raised a premiership cup as coach.
10 years - A decade has passed already since Port Adelaide took home its first, and thus far only, AFL premiership. While Micro Noises isn't trying to scare Power fans, we do note certain similarities to the Footscray team of 1954. Both teams made one more Grand Final several years later (Footscray in 1961; Port Adelaide in 2007), only to be soundly beaten by a team breaking a long drought (36 years for Hawthorn, 44 years for Geelong), that would go on to record golden eras (nine flags in 31 years for Hawthorn; three flags in five years for Geelong). We can only hope for Power fans that Port Adelaide isn't still looking for a third Grand Final and a second premiership in 2064.
The long and the short of it
Micro Noises has been hard at work over the off-season, auditing our vast database of players, seeking out and correcting discrepancies. We can report that this has been a largely successful operation and can now categorically state that the Peter Stephens who played 102 games for Geelong between 1902 and 1908 and the Peter Stephens who made 35 appearances for the Cats between 1971 and 1973 are not in fact the same person. Though we are pleased that this discrepancy has been resolved, we must confess to being slightly disappointed to discover that no player’s career has spanned 72 seasons. However we still retain hope that this may yet happen, with Dustin Fletcher having decided to saddle up for another season in 2014.
One thing our audit did uncover was a group of players whose careers spanned more than a decade, yet who played very few matches. Here’s a list of men who played their first and last games at least 10 years apart, but who averaged less than two games per season. This is by no means a comprehensive list, and we would welcome additions via our comments section below.
PLAYER | TEAM(S) | DEBUT | LAST YEAR | TOTAL GAMES | AVE. GAMES/SEASON |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Ernie Cazaly | St Kilda | 1910 | 1919 | 2 | 0.20 |
Dick Chandler | Haw, Carl | 1931 | 1940 | 3 | 0.30 |
Billy Walsh | Melb, Fitz | 1934 | 1944 | 4 | 0.36 |
Ted Fisher | St K, Rich | 1907 | 1918 | 5 | 0.42 |
Harry Britter | Melb, Geel | 1914 | 1924 | 6 | 0.55 |
Alan Story | Hawthorn | 1932 | 1944 | 15 | 1.15 |
Chris Aitken | Melbourne | 1967 | 1977 | 14 | 1.27 |
Bertie Wollacott | Rich, Melb | 1911 | 1921 | 14 | 1.27 |
The light and the short of it
But it hasn’t been all hard work for Micro Noises in the off-season. We spent our free time leafing through the pages of the 2014 edition of the AFL Record Season Guide (Isn’t that how everybody spends their free time?) and came across an interesting fact on page 693. It turns out that, at just 51 kg. George Shorten is the lightest player to have played VFL/AFL footy. We were quite excited by this revelation, but then disappointed to discover that the shortest player in VFL/AFL history isn’t George Lighten. (It is in fact the 155-centimetre Jim Bradford.)
ZIP code of the week
A nice tribute from the Western Bulldogs to their All Australian ruckman Will Minson in their NAB Challenge match against Fremantle on Wednesday night. Minson’s old SANFL club is Norwood, and the Dogs acknowledged this by registering a half-time score of 0.7.6.48. And as everyone knows, 07648 is the ZIP code of Norwood in New Jersey.
Ridiculous footy anagram of the week
We had hoped to amuse you by telling you how appropriate it is that all pre-season matches are broadcast only on pay TV because the NAB CHALLENGE is and anagram of CABLE CHANNEL, but unfortunately it is in fact an anagram of GABLE CHANNEL.
Instead we’ll tell you that the fourth pick in the 2013 draft, Marcus BONTEMPELLI, looks set to have an impact on the game in his first season at AFL level. The young man exudes confidence and, although he might not say it out loud, he could well be thinking the anagram of his own surname as he looks around at his contemporaries in the league: “I’LL BE TOP, MEN”.
Micro Noises is Andrew Gigacz's regular, quirky look at all things footy. The name Micro Noises is an anagram of Enrico Misso, who played one game for St Kilda in 1985. He remains the only Enrico and the only Misso to have played footy at the highest level.
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