Micro Noises 62 - Retiree Round
Not shy but retiring
Congratulations are in order on fine careers to several players who announced their retirement from the game this week. One of them, Collingwood's Nick Maxwell, has played his last game; another, Dom Cassisi of Port Adelaide, will play his last match this Sunday and Saint Lenny Hayes will hang up his boots when this season draws to a close.
In Lenny's case, we'd like to suggest that he consider making St Kilda's penultimate game for 2014 his last, for a couple of reasons. Firstly, the Saints last home and away game of the year will be against Adelaide in Adelaide, meaning many long-standing Saints fans will not get to give him a live farewell. But if Lenny makes round 22 his last game, they'll be able to do so at the MCG in St Kilda's match against Richmond. Secondly - and far more importantly in our statistically-addled minds, a retirement after round 22 would mean that Hayes (assuming he plays in all other matches this season) will finish his career with an AFL games total of 296 - a total on which no previous player has ended their career. If Lenny goes on and plays at the Adelaide Oval, he'll have to share his career total with Richmond's Wayne Campbell. Not that there's anything wrong with that, we just feel that a man as unique as Lenny Hayes deserves a unique number on which to go out.
Meanwhile, despite Nick Maxwell's ankle injury last weekend having been deemed to be career-ending, we'd actually suggests he reverse his decision to retire immediately and hobble around in whatever way he can for Collingwood's last six home and away matches. Why? Because that will give Nick a career games total of 214, the only total below 287 on which no player has ended a career.
On the other hand, we reckon Dom Cassisi should have retired after the Power beat Collingwood in last year's Elimination Final. That way it would have been he who became the first player to finish his career on 214 games.
Not shy and not yet retiring
One player who can't get a game this year and who might well soon hang up the boots is Sydney's Ryan O'Keefe. If Ryan can convince Swans coach John Longmire to give him one last farewell game in the coming weeks then he will become the first player to end his VFL/AFL career on 287 games. Other possible candidates for finishing their career on 287 are Dean Cox, who like O'Keefe has played 286 games, and Geelong's Corey Enright, who has played 280 matches. Six home-and-away matches and a final could see him go out on that total.
Ultimately, if the stars align and we get our wish with Lenny Hayes finishing on 296 games, Nick Maxwell on 214 and Ryan O'Keefe on 287, the only games totals below 300 on which no player has ended their career will be 299, 298 and 295. And we can work on filling those gaps next year!
Score Wars: The spirit of 76
West Coast's 12-point win over Brisbane at the 'Gabba on Saturday night gave 76 its eighth run as a final score in 2014, moving it into joint-leadership with 87 and 91. That trio are ahead of 81 and 92, which have popped up seven times each this season. Meanwhile 33, 36, 122 and 126 were registered as final scores for the first time this season in round 17. While 36 and 122 came up last year, it was the first appearance for 126 since round 18, 2012 and the first for 33 since round five, 2009.
The Marginal Medal: The Spirit of 76 - again!
No movement at the top in the Marginal Medal for the second week running, with 8 points remaining the most common margin of the season, having come up seven times. Moving to second spot is 20, the difference between Richmond and Port making it the sixth such margin this year, and the fifth since round 10. And popping up for the first time in 2014 last weekend was 76 points, the margin in the Fremantle-GWS game. Its previous appearance was in Carlton's defeat of Melbourne in round 20, 2011.
First among unequals
Two new score pairings were welcomed into the AFL fold this week. North Melbourne's win over St Kilda and Fremantle's drubbing of GWS gave 92 v 33 and 136 v 60 their first runs as VFL/AFL final scores.
Meanwhile Hawthorn's win over Adelaide on Friday night made it two-all for the Hawks in matches that have finished with a final score of 104 v 92. Hawthorn's 104 v 92 history is (click on the venue for match details):
YEAR | ROUND | RESULT | VENUE |
1947 | 7 | South Melbourne 15.14.104 v Hawthorn 12.20.92 | Lake Oval |
1976 | 4 | Hawthorn 14.20.104 v Footscray 14.8.92 | Waverley |
1987 | 5 | Hawthorn 13.14.92 v West Coast 15.14.104 | Princes Park |
2014 | 17 | Adelaide 14.8.92 v Hawthorn 15.14.104 | Adelaide Oval |
The biggest loser
Congratulations to Port Adelaide on its result against Richmond at Docklands on Saturday. No, we're not being mockingly cruel - we do know that the Power lost for the fourth time in five weeks - but there was a positive side. Port's score of 16.10.106 was the highest losing total so far this season.
Postcodes of the week
The Saints had a miserable day at Hobart last Saturday, thrashed by North Melbourne in cold and wet conditions. For those St Kilda fans who felt the urge to BOO their team's effort, given the Saints have plenty of youngsters who are trying their best in this phase of their development, we hope you refrained or at least did so only very LIGHTly, especially given that the final score was 33-92 and that 3392 is the postcode of BOOLITE.
Meanwhile, for those of you who have been GABBING about the Lions 64-76 loss to the Eagles at the GABBA, we'd just like to point out that 6476 is the postcode of GABBIN.
Ridiculous footy anagrams of the week
As a tribute to the retiring Lenny Hayes, loved by all and sundry involved with the St Kilda Footy Club, we'd like to point out that SAINT LEONARD HAYES is an anagram of "A SAINTLAND HERO?" "YES!". Lenny will sadly fall just short of the magical 300-game mark, a figure he would have surpassed easily had he not ruptured his ACL in round two, 2011, causing him to miss the rest of that season. That sad story is revealed in the fact that LENNY HAYES, ST KILDA is an anagram of HAD NASTY, SILLY KNEE.
Micro Noises is Andrew Gigacz's regular, quirky look at all things footy. The name Micro Noises is an anagram of Enrico Misso, who played one game for St Kilda in 1985. He remains the only Enrico and the only Misso to have played footy at the highest level.
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